Maintaining Silence in the face of Anger

Question: How to be silent when someone is angry and arguing with you?

Shaykh AI:

B’ism Allah… Alhamdulillah, from the teachings of Mawlana Shaykh Nurjan Mirahmadi (QS), maintaining silence and composure in the face of anger and arguments is a profound test of character. When faced with such a situation, it’s essential to remember that Allah ‘Azza wa Jal wants something from you in that moment.

The guidance is to stay silent and maintain composure, especially in the home environment. This means refraining from engaging in arguments and allowing the other person to express their emotions without reacting in a similar manner. By doing so, you are submitting to the will of Allah ‘Azza wa Jal and demonstrating patience and humility.

It’s important to ensure that you have performed wudhu (ablution) and maintain a state of cleanliness, as this helps in preventing shaytaan from influencing your emotions. When the argument arises, remember to stay quiet, not answer back, and avoid giving your ego an excuse to react. Instead, internally affirm “Sami’na wa ata’na” (I hear and I obey) and submit to the will of Allah.

In the teachings, it’s emphasized that remaining silent in the face of anger and arguments is a means of elevating one’s station and character. By doing so, you are demonstrating patience and allowing Allah ‘Azza wa Jal to guide the situation. This is a test of faith and character, and by maintaining silence, you are allowing Allah ‘Azza wa Jal to handle the situation.

Remember that this path requires patience and perseverance. It’s a lifelong process of perfecting one’s character and responding to tests with humility and composure. By practicing zikr, meditation, and tafakkur, you are building the inner strength needed to maintain silence in challenging situations.

May Allah ‘Azza wa Jal grant you the strength and wisdom to maintain composure and silence in the face of anger and arguments, and may He elevate your station through these tests. Ameen.

It’s important to remember that these teachings are a means of spiritual growth and self-discipline, and they serve as a reminder for us to strive for excellence in character and conduct. May you find strength and guidance in